I am in a closed committed relationship. We are very happy with each other and don’t want any thing to muck it up. So for those that are also in a closed relationship, do you notice you are treated differently at events because you aren’t free to play?
What would like to do at an event since you are in a closed relationship?
FL: Not really, event if you’re open and you didn’t wanna play during a mosh, people look at you differently…. Sometimes I ask myself if there’s a social thing in pup play or if it’s only sexual thing… What do you think about that ??
MS: I think by choosing monogamy you exclude yourself from certain opportunities that are prevalent at large events. You aren’t being treated differently you have chosen to be different from the average pup and handler. It’s not better or worse, it’s simply you’re choice.
PT: Being “closed” and “insecure” are NOT synonymous. It’s those who can’t understand the difference in that who cause confusion. Your milkshake might bring all of the pups to the yard but you are NOT required to let the other pups taste your milkshake although there’s nothing wrong with them looking. Confidence is sexy, enjoy it and dismiss those who can’t respect that.
CR: We’ve been married for over 12 years my handler and I and we are very monogamous, but I’ve discovered I can be an Alpha to a beta just as a very close friend and we have a super bond with each other that doesn’t involve sex.
MS: I’m reading a lot of personal insecurity and finger pointing. It’s really simple, you be you and choose what you want from the world. If someone like me says sorry I like to fuck with my Handlers stop getting all hurt about it. Our interested are not compatible, simple as that. You’re not being treated badly, you’re not being left out, you don’t want what I want. That’s it. It’s simple. If you want what I got you can always talk to your partner and say “hey, can we share that”. Then you’d be monogamish, but it’s YOUR CHOICE! Stop blaming others for how you live your life.
DC: I think the only thing that would result in different treatment of a mono couple is their response to breaches of this agreement. It’s hard to be in sex-positive spaces while limiting any sexual conduct.
What’s important is recognizing that people who do something like get a little handsy are doing so out of ignorance of your relationship and not from neglecting consent. So long as that is understood and breaches are handled gracefully, I haven’t seen a mono couple treated differently.