Pup BarksMicroblogging of Pup Play Inspiration
In the Pups and Handler community, we find ourselves using a special set of words that, outside of the community, don’t have the same meaning. This “jargon” becomes difficult to understand when you’re learning. Maybe you’ve heard of some of it already as it’s difficult to ignore.
The common terms you’ll run into are Handler, Alpha, Beta, and Omega. If you know anything about wolf pack dynamics, this might be something you’re familiar too. That or if you have owned a dog, you might have found yourself being called a handler. Although that information can bleed over into the world of human pups, it’s not as black and white as you’ll realize the more you mingle within our community. Soon, the words Handler, Alpha, Beta, and Omega will because you don’t know “what it means to you”.
Let’s first start off by stating this. There is always a learning curve when you first start anything new and that is alright. By the end of these series of articles, we hope that it may clear up this set of jargon, and allow you to understand what it means when you hear these words and what it might mean to you.
“Pack roles” are a form of structure within the pup community, and each role has a meaning and purpose. Handlers and Alphas are considered to hold more of a Dominant role while Betas are considered more Versatile, and Omegas are considered to be Submissive by trade.
In this article, we’ll focus on the Submissive and Versatile pack roles.
Pups who consider themselves as Omegas normally will find themselves not wanting to take on the role of leadership. They find it more to their enjoyment to service those they believe have earned both their respect and trust. Omegas tend to love making others happy, whether it’s in the act of sexual pleasure or during their Dom’s day to day life. Within a pack, they may find themselves following the orders of their Handler, Alpha, or Beta. The orders can vary from keeping the house clean, making sure they are waiting at the door for walkies, or sitting naked at the ends of the bed, ready to serve. However, keep in mind that Omega pups do have a mind of their own.
Submission does not mean weakness. Submission is a powerful gift, one that is not given lightly. If you demand an Omega to do what you want, please you in the way you need, and they did not give consent nor know you, then you should not be surprised when you get the exact opposite of what you asked for. Omegas are their own person and although they are more followers than leaders, they are not weak. They will and can stand up for themselves and they do deserve the same level of respect that is given to those who takes on a Dom role.
If you find yourself to be more on the submission side of things, and this sounds more like you, then an Omega is a fine role to fill. It is a role full of service, one in which you strive to make another smile and gain a sense of fulfillment from it. It is a role that is amazing and one to be proud of!
Now, Betas. Versatile, especially if you identify yourself as LGBTQ, may have a lot of different meanings. Yet, for a pup that finds themselves under the role of Beta, it is more leaning to the aspect of Versatility with being a Dom and a sub. This is something that allows them to be able to jump back and forth between being a leader or a follower.
Some may think that they are being indecisive but truly they are not. Beta pups tend to know they do not want to be stuck in a specific role forever. They don’t always want to be someone’s sub nor do they want to be stuck in a position where they have full control over another as a Dom. Which is absolutely fine! Beta pups versatility within a pack makes it easier for both the Doms and subs cause this allows a Beta to see both sides of the spectrum. They can help lessen the burdens of those they serve and help guide and keep those under them in check.
A Beta’s role is truly a strong and important role within the community. You will find Beta’s versatility allows them to be amazing teachers because they can guide both sides in understanding one another. If you feel a certain tug towards being a Beta, then excellent! Know that you, within a pack, are the checks and balance between the top and bottom. Know that although you may enjoy being under an Alpha’s or Handlers hand, that you can nip them if they step out of line. Know that if your Omega is feeling hurt and weak that you can be there to lift them up. You have the power to serve others in more ways than one and you should relish in your power as a verse.
Puppy Play opens the human experience towards a new spiritual pathway into shapeshifting magick. A practice that was commonly used in early ritualistic practices all across the world. The dog, which is the common animal in puppy play, has not only been man’s best friend, but the companion of many spiritual practitioners, personal familiars, and even the guardians of the Divine.
Many pups have transcended beyond the sexual construct and have developed a relationship with a spiritual kindred; which has the ability to create a metaphysical symbiotic bond. This enables the individual to create a stand alone supernatural construct; evolving a fetish, into a spiritual avatar when they dawn the hood and the collar. It prepares the individual’s soul for a transference of civilization to the animalistic, and conjoins them creating of hybrid of canine and human energies.
Pup energy workers should start out by finding their own personal core and looking at the physiological energy centers of the pup, as a biped and as a quadruped. (Biped core will be around the solar plexus or diaphragm region, where the quadruped will be closer to the navel or mid abdomen.)
When the pup is in its bipedal stance, there are many basic points of energetic communication and interaction.
The first being the eyes, the hood shields human features; removing any non-verbal facial communication, which is one of the major ways of nonverbal communication. The eyes become one of the primary biological sources of emitting emotions. The eyes direct the ability for the pup to display emotion and transmit energy, through visual displays.
When working with the eyes, allow yourself to locate your core and begin to focus on your energy development. Begin to flourish your energy within your core and allow it to circle in your body till it becomes pliable. Move the energy in a circular formation, till you feel you have manifested the desired effect,[ You will know when you have manifested the proper amount of energy ( ie love, wrath, or playfulness) when you can feel the energetic emotion become tangible and you have the ability to move it through the body. ]
Allow the energy to flow through your chest and follow up your spine and exit out your eyes. ( I find that letting out a simple noise or word at the intended person helps to release the energy, when you are first getting started.)
Hands are the basic source of moving energy, often practiced by most beginning energy practitioners . If the fingers are curved to form a paw, direct the energy from the pads of your hands and palms. (If you find that the fingers release excess energy, allow that energy to flow in a circuit between the fingers and thumb. Allow the circuit to strengthen the primary movement of energy by moving the energy towards the pad of the hand.)
Finally, in the biped form, another energy center is the lower abdomen/ belt of atlas and the genitalia. By altering your mood and intentions your body naturally release androstenone, a pheromone that will create different reactions in people and animals. Your body releases pheromones, sending out a cerebral messages to other creatures around you .
By focusing on your emotional goal, your body releases your on biological smell to create a reaction with other animals and humans . (The adrenal gland plays an important role in the imitation of pheromones. You also release a fair amount of pheromones from your armpits as well, but most people cover them up with deodorants and colognes.) So the area around the sex organs, will release a chemical communication which will enable a reaction by people around.
The genitalia has a power all to itself, as a biped it stands out on the front of our bodies. This allows the pup to use his phallus as a energetic tool in his arsenal. Properly developing your lower abdominal energy, locate your core again and begin to circle your intentions within the core area. Start setting your mindset of what you need to accomplish, while you are doing this. Your adrenal gland will start releasing the message through pheromones. Begin to move the energy down the curvature of your abdomen, than begin to move the energy forward through your pelvis, lower abdomen and genitalia. ( If you are doing this during sex, you can alter sexual experiences by changing up energetic patterns)
The quadruped form of the pup, will manifest different areas of energetic centers. (Note that in the quadruped position your core will change locations, ideally it will move lower, towards mid to lower back and abdomen.)
In the quadruped position the eyes will continue to be a primary source of energy communication and emission.
The next area of energetic movement comes out of the chest and breastplate The chest becomes a major form of moving energy, a a quadruped pup. With the arms in a downward stance it opens up the chest to direct energy. Tensing the pectorals and trapezius muscles, while lifting the head, the tension helps to create a perfect environment for moving energy. (Adding the tension of a harness may help the pup to focus on the area to move energy through the chest. ) This stance creates a perfect symmetry, for opening the chest for projecting energy. This posture has the ability to move a
substantial amounts of energy forward like a cannon.
To move energy through the chest and breastplate you will need to find your core, and begin to circle the energy till it reaches the intensity apex that you need accomplish the task you desire. Once the energy is properly cured push it forward out of the chest and shoulders. (If you are having difficulties transmitting energy through your chest, don’t worry, often times using a bark or a growl will help to move the energy through the chest giving it some extra intensity.
The “pounce” is another significant way of moving energy. To use a pounce to move energy you will need to utilize the chest, arms, and paws. The pounce releases a quick, but effective burst of energy. Develop the energy in your core, and move it up to the chest, begin to focus the energy down your arms. When you push up to land the pounce, direct all energy to the front paws, landing a powerful burst of energy.
Paws and pads are a non-intense way for pups to deliver energy, in a playful manner. Canines use their paws to deliver emotion and transmit every day dog commentary on the world. They scratch to get our attention and to direct us to behave like proper masters and handlers.
Scratching lets out small burst of energy and intention. (Since it requires less energy, either core bipedal or quadruped can be utilized.) The energy should be directed towards the paws, and release it in small bursts. (Advanced practitioners, can divide their intentions. Using their left paw for one type of energy and their right to send another type of energy.)
The fourth is the howl, canines have howled at the moon since they dawn of time. The primal howl holds intense power, with the satisfaction of euphoric, raw energy release. The howl can be used as a prayer, or for setting a boundary like witches cast a circle. The energy of the howl is raw, but that is what gives the intensity to its power.
The energy should come from the lowest part of your core. Lean back on your haunches to help achieve adding depth to your howl. Leaving the front paws grounded on the floor in front of you. Focus all the energy you can muster and allow the energy to move from the depth and grow with ferber, as it moves up the body and out of the mouth. It is ok to let the howl be loud and intense as you want it to be. It is supposed to primal explosion of energy, so just let it loose.
What is your name?
What is your Scene name?
How did you get that name?
I decided to choose my own pup name. I can be quite a deep (overthinking) philosophy thinker and chose a name with a lot of meaning to me. I enjoy astronomy, looking up at the stars and thinking of the amazing possibilities out there. So, I chose the name Tycho after the 16th century Dutch astronomer Tycho Brahe. My pup last name Aurora I chose also to my connection to astronomy and looking up and beyond at the unknown. An Aurora is a beautiful display of electromagnetic potential and is a nod to myself at my constant drive to better myself and reaching for the stars.
How old are you and where were you born?
I am 31yrs old. Born and grew up in New Zealand on an island in the South Pacific. About 6 years ago I moved to Melbourne, Australia because my hometown of Christchurch in New Zealand’s South Island was devastated by the 2011 earthquakes
What do you do for work?
I am a game/graphic/web designer, primarily recreation of historical and archeological sites into 3D virtual reality for schools to use to teach history in an immersive way than boring history textbooks. I liaison with several governments and many museums across the world on this.
What is your dream job?
Luckily, I am already. It pays absolute peanuts, but it gives me the satisfaction of doing my part of help society step forward, no matter how small. I have been self-employed in this since 2011 during a trip to Beijing and the feedback from schools and students from across the world who use my work fills my heart and keeps me going.
When did you first realize you were into pup play?
Curiosity, pure and simple. 2 ½ years ago I was introduced to pup play enough to seek it out. When I realized I was researching things more than just a simple, answering what pup play is, one thing led to another and here I am.
How were you introduced to puppy play?
Would be shortly after I moved to Australia in 2012 I was introduced to someone who identified as a Kangaroo. This was something I least expect, asked a few questions and found the concept of animal roleplay intriguing. It wasn’t until 2015 until I had a friend who said they identified as a pup and got a chance to ask a lot of questions that I started to get really into the thick of it.
Is pup play sexual or non-sexual for you?
It’s both, and interchangeable and independent; really depends on the situation, crowd and desires of people around me.
Describe your first time:
My first real experience was actually when I was really down and also very drunk with a friend that was also a pup. It let me have less inhibitions and let me howl, yip and bark to my heart’s content. I haven’t looked back since.
What did you think of your first experience?
I’m not much of a drinker, let alone to get drunk. My first experience was a surprise to say the least. I found the mental escape and translation of internal pain to external expression in puppy form to be freeing and liberating; far more than drinking have or could ever help me with. From then on, I was hooked to explore pup play further.
What do you identify most with? Alpha, beta, omega, service or guard
I identify as an Alpha pup who also is a handler. I feel protective and an enabler of others’ potentials. One of my kinks as you could say is transformation. I get off on helping others reach their goals just as much as me achieving my goals. Whether they are physical, mental, sexual or emotional aims in life. I try my best to help. While I used to have my own pack, they flew the coop a while ago, I’m in no rush to have a pack again or collar my own pup/s.
What was your first piece of gear?
Squeaky ball toy. Something to thrash when angry, something to cuddle when sad, something to play with when cheeky. It’s a good all-round toy for any aspiring pup.
What events have you been to?
Dinners, moshes, private, social and public events. Sydney Mardi Gras, Melbourne Midsumma Pride. Northside Bizarre and Adelaide Fetish and Leather Weekend. I haven’t had the chance to go to any American events yet (but that also is planned to change this year ) I helped set up the inaugural Australian Pup and Handler Competition weekend (APHC) as well.
Have you won any awards?
None so far. Been too busy creating and running events plus the Pupplay.info website to compete for any.
What groups or clubs do you belong to?
There is the local leather association VicLeather and also VICPAH (Victorian Pups and Handlers) who are the largest PAH group in the country with almost 600 members.
What do you do in your free time?
Umm, what’s this free time you speak of?
What do you do for fun?
I have a lot of hobbies. Aquarium Fish, Mineral Collecting, Radio & Solar Astronomy, Creative Writing, Miniature Origami, Archery, Ultimate Frisbee, PC Gaming, Gardening, Bird Keeping & Archeology
What’s your favorite sport and team?
Back in the day, I was a professional track cyclist and swim coach in New Zealand. I still follow the velodromes and swimming competitions. I also enjoy archery a lot and always keep track of the New Zealand squads
What is your advice for new pups?
Its okay to not know what you want. The journey is half the fun. There is nothing you have to have except being open to new experiences. If you try something you don’t like, don’t do it again, strike it off the list and try something else. Sooner or later your pup persona will form, and it will be unique to you.
What is your advice for new Handlers?
It’s a two-way street. Pups expect things from you just as you expect things from pups and you’ll get nowhere if you impose your rule over others. It will only ostracize you from the community. Explore things together, two heads are better than one and we can always learn something new.
In one sentence how would you describe the puppy community?
“The only rule is that there are no rules” concept that we are part of a community that has evolved to have diversity as a cornerstone. (This I feel is awesome!)
What inspired you to create pupplay.info?
I got frustrated with some of the (very few) toxic elitist member in the community having a large voice and with my past experience being a community leader and moderating in the gaming industry I decided to act than wait and create a “choose your own path” set of resources. I did this so than just let the “pup play must be this way” people, bully people that are wanting to have the independence of experiencing things how they want to.
I have found loving and supporting others just makes a better community as a whole (this applies to any kind of community) especially when people have the opportunity to step up and set a good example for others. While there will always be toxic people and bullies; they don’t have to win. All we need is people to stand up and take the first step to be better than silent.
What do you find challenging about Pupplay.info?
“The only rule is that there are no rules” concept. I will still stand by that though, we are part of a community that has evolved to have diversity as a cornerstone. While this presents a lot of challenges, the freedom to be loved and supported with self-expression is a rare opportunity that many people don’t get in general society. This is also the worst concept in the world for a website trying to provide resources and ideas to inspire people. A website can collapse into a mountain of random links sparsely connected to each other. I sit down at least monthly trying to figure out how the hundreds of topics and resources can be organized better. It’ll be an eternal struggle, but there is nothing wrong with a challenge.
What Can People Do on Pupplay.info?
Pupplay.info has a lot of tools and resources. Here is a short list.
· Puppy Archive: A collection of resources about our community history. From events and organizations more than a decade or two old to the oldest photograph of animal roleplay (1912 by the way)
· Maps: Explore pups from around the world from our registered users (free) that you can keep your own details up to date which no other pup social map does. You can also find a growing map of organizations, events and pup friendly venues too.
· Regular Articles: Anyone signed up can contribute and have an article published. Want to help expand the help for others? Go right ahead!
· Gear Library: There is a lot of gear and a lot of custom gear, we are building a library of gear for you to see what brands are out there and where to go to get them with no bias or marketing getting in the way.
· Ran the that gathered over . We also fulfilled our promise that the research results would be freely available and are in a free e-book download for anyone to access.
· Nerdy Doggo gear is a non-profit brand of merchandise that keeps the website Advert-free and also allows the website to create more complex resources and help host events across the world including some of the above-mentioned resources.
What else would you like to share about pupplay.info?
In January, PupPlay.Info turns two years old! it’s been such, such an awesome build up from the success of our first year. None of this still would not be possible without you all! the entire community! We have created 78 pages of guides and 240 articles on a wide variety of topics in pup play (contributed by over 300 different people), and 2,300 registered users since our inception.
Donations through Nerdy Doggo was a big success this past year! While our Redbubble sales don’t make much, every dollar counts. We have raised enough money to keep PupPlay.Info advert free for 2018 and set up the foundations of the Puppy Archives; A resource of information about current and past events, figures and groups in our community for preserving and recording our community history. (Kind of like what the Leather Archives function as). We also begun work on a comprehensive book (coming out in 2018) about the diversity of the pup play community in a way that’s as non-biased as possible to help inspire people to try new things and help learn about themselves.
Your purchases from our RedBubble Store has made this possible. Without it, these projects would not have happened. We are thankful you have put faith in us and we hope to continue forward in 2018 and help support the community even more! We have so many projects planned it will be a constant flow of resources so check back often!
How can people get ahold of you?
I try my best to be as approachable as possible. This community will collapse if we don’t work together and I try my best to help others with this. There’s no territory for people to close off to others. Pup play isn’t a business for people to treat everyone else as a competitor to undermine. So, please, don’t hesitate to ask if u need help, either I can help you in your projects or point you at the right people.
Originally published in Barking News Magazine
Now how many of you noticed your blood boil, or your fingers go tingly, or your mind begin to race when you read the title? Good, let’s talk about that.
In the brain, there’s a response to stress. It’s called fight or flight (or freeze as some have added). Our brains cannot tell the difference between a stressor like a Jaguar showing up in a tree, or someone who cut us off in traffic. Now, what’s super fun about the brain is that when it’s confronted by a stressor, which activates that natural instinct, our pre-frontal cortex (the part of our brain responsible for rational decision making) turns off. Isn’t that a neat trick?! It’s neat when faced with a Jaguar, cause you need to live. Not so neat when faced with a statement that challenges your deeply held beliefs. It messes up your ability to engage. It’s also not helpful in traffic. Trust me, I become a raging monster.
I’m gonna be doing some more psychology groundwork here to get us all on the same page. Please stick with me.
The next thing I wanna tell you about is confirmation bias: the tendency for ALL brains to find, get attached to, and integrate things we ALREADY KNOW or things that CONFIRM what we think is true. Everyone does it. It’s why we have double blind studies. It’s why conspiracy theories can be so loosely woven together that they “make sense” to people. We like to be right. And that’s ok.
So every time we are confronted with an experience, event, or nugget of knowledge, and our brain connects it to something we think is true, we get a little happy dose of chemicals. Mmmm that feels lovely right? Not only does it feel good, it strengthens that connection. So next time someone is rude to you, and you think it’s because “you’re not (blank) enough” because that’s an experience you had in the past? Mmmm happy chemicals. Congratulations! You made that thought and pathway stronger and more likely to show up again and again!
The brain is kind of a dick huh!
Here’s another nugget of truth: your brain is meant to keep you alive, not to make you thrive. What does that mean: your brain is evolutionarily programmed to keep doing stuff that’s worked! So chances are you reacting passively, angrily, ignoring things, being a perpetrator, being a victim, or any other emotions or feelings have kept you going for ten or more years. And ya that can be incredibly frustrating.
It’s one of the reasons I push for something I call “thickening the story” when I work with clients.
A lotta times, a client will speak with me about how “bad” or “awful” they are, and tell me about a situation that “proves” to me that they are. And what I do as a therapist is ask questions, teach them what I mentioned above (this can take quite a few sessions), and invite them to look at themselves as not being at fault. Chances are, there were specific circumstances, nuances, and random chance that may have affected their behavior.
This is thickening the story. It’s removing the label of black or white, which generally means all or nothing, and even good vs evil. It allows for more depth, understanding, sympathy and most important of all: empathy. That person sitting in front of me is no longer a thing to be judged. It’s a person like me, full of thousands of pages of knowledge that influence who and what they are. So how disrespectful of them would it be for me to judge that behavior?
“Only a Sith deals in absolutes.”
It’s a huge battle and a constant struggle. And some of it has truly only happened because I decided to make mental health my life’s work. Which also means I have to be willing to do my own work to confront biased and such. So for any of you looking to go into mental health? We all know you’re doing it to figure yourself out (I did and so did all my classmates) so I hope you’re ready to uncover some weird stuff and sit with it!
Now back to the point: consent is not black and white.
One more thing I want to introduce before we continue: mindfulness. Being mindful is not thinking about nothing. The very base of mindfulness is just watching without getting caught up in a thought. Some have explained it to me as laying in the grass looking at the clouds. You see one, you know it’s there, you allow it to come into your visual framework and you study it. Pretty soon another cloud comes into view, and naturally you allow the other to leave your view until another comes.
The easiest way for me to understand it is curiosity. A thought or emotion pops into my brain, and rather than getting attached to what it says, or believing everything it says is true, I turn my head to the side a little and say, “now that’s an interesting thought!” No judgment, no value statements. I am curious about myself and what my brain does on its own: think. Your brain will always be thinking. Until you’re dead. Until then, I promise, your brain will be in a constant state of throwing out some wild stuff. You just get to witness it!
So if at any time during the dialogue below, you find yourself struggling, go back and read the above. The above is meant to give a framework into my thinking and my beliefs. It’s also based on a lot of psychology, neuroscience, sociology, meditation, and other random tidbits I’ve picked up along the way.
The point of saying consent is not black and white is to thicken the story, allow for nuance, and make for a deeper understanding.
Chances are you make hundreds of decisions that involve consent every day. Should I smile at that person? What about grabbing something that’s falling? Does this person need a hand across the street? Someone is crying on the bus, what do I do? My friend is coming over and feels sad, should I put my arm around them? Do I lift up that person who fell? Someone is touching me and I’m uncomfortable. Someone is touching me and I’m very comfortable.
I’m sure in each of those scenarios, some thoughts when through your head on how you’d react. And possibly some judgment about others depending on how THEY would react. If we cut off the dialogue of asking what made that person consciously or unconsciously make their choice, we throw out a two page story of theirs. We don’t bother reading their story or getting to know it. We sum up their choice and their life into something brief, detestable, and throw it away. We show great disrespect to them and us by not allowing their story to live.
I do not type up a list of things every day that are or are not ok. Because let’s face it, our moods change faster than we realize and one moment we may wanna cry into the shoulder of a friend, and the next recoil at the slightest human touch. That’s ok!
I like when strangers touch me basically anywhere except my butt and my penis, and as long as it’s not a painful touch. But that’s just me! Other people can’t stand any sort of touch at all! And that’s ok! So if someone touches me and I do like it, I’ll try and make a conversation about it:
“oooh hey thanks, btw, do I know you? Cause this feels great but it might be better in my room or after I at least know your name.”
Or: “oh hey I’m having a really bad day and I’d prefer a hug rather than something sensual. It’s making me feel uncomfortable.”
Did you see that? Dialogue! Also, I owned my feelings. No blame assigned to the other, just me owning what I’m feeling and expressing it.
Now this is where I’ll own some of my own assumptions. And I’m sure I’m missing a few but these are my basic rules around consent. These are all based on my own experiences, and everyone will be different. This is just leading to more thoughts and discussion:
- If non-verbal communication is the only thing to do, touch a place that’s not gonna be taboo like an ear, nose, shoulder, back, or snout.
- Before beginning a scene, teach safety words for “go”, “slow down”, “stop”, and “I need everything to stop immediately so I can feel safe.”
- If I have been told twice or more that a certain behavior makes people uncomfortable, check in with myself, my therapist and friends. I can absolutely be wrong.
- If multiple people in any minority group says “(blank) is not okay no matter in the past, present or future” I will respect that limit. Unless asked to push against that limit by that person whether in or out of a scene.
- If I like something and I dunno how the other person feels, ALWAYS start at the least discomfort level. If they respond positively or give the safe word for “go” or “more” I will very slowly continue, always giving time and space for them to say “slow down” or “enough”, at ANY point.
- If substances are involved, I will be even more slow and cautious in my coming into their space, asking for consent and exploring.
- I will take responsibility for unintentionally hurting someone on purpose or accident, by apologizing if necessary.
- I will remind myself that it is not my fault when someone chooses not to respect their own limits by using pre-established safety rules and words. My safety matters. And mine comes first.
These are my basic rules. And I think they’re decent.
Notice that it’s not a “yes” or “no” list. Imagine all the stuff you could potentially miss out on if neither person got to explain their story, or show you the intricacies involved in something. Does saying consent is black and white work? To some extent. It shows the seriousness of the issue.
But it leaves no room for discussion. It’s totalitarian in its simplicity and marketing. It makes a villain of one person and a victim of the other. And I don’t like being in either of those spaces for too long.
So please, in all your doings, make room for a story. Look for the in-the-middle spaces that allow for a deeper understanding of people and their lives. You don’t have to adopt their views. And their views deserve to be taken seriously.
With all my love,
Written By: Handler Blaise
“…I highly recommend that you take the time to get to know the other person you want to be in a dynamic with…”
Dynamic, it’s a goal that a lot of handlers and puppies look forwards towards.
However, haste makes waste. It’s extremely important that both handlers, as well as puppies, must take in consideration who we want to be in a dynamic with…
Just because a puppy comes up to a handler, stating they want to be in a dynamic doesn’t mean you should jump on it immediately. The same goes for puppies when a Handler randomly approaches them.
No one person is able to fit everyone’s needs. We all have our interest and we all have our dislikes. We all have our own specific kinks that we enjoy and some that we don’t care for. As such, I highly recommend that you take the time to get to know the other person you want to be in a dynamic with and sit them down. Discuss the things you’re into, both outside of the bedroom (especially for those that are wanting a platonic relationship) as well as those within it.
Now this does not mean that if you and the other party aren’t into the same things that you cannot be in a dynamic. In fact I encourage those that may be on the fence about certain kinks or want to try certain kinks to reach out to puppies or handlers that are into them. I know I’ve learned a lot of great new things from my puppies and the majority of the things I expand it on in my journey through has been taught to me by my subs.
Though at the end of it all make sure that the person that you want to be in a dynamic wave at least matches you on a personal level so that way you can communicate and grow in the relationship.
Picking The Right Clothing For Puppy Play
Written By: Whiteout
Puppies have a diverse range of activities to choose from! Whether it’s a rough mosh, playing catch, or snuggling up closely with someone they love. It’s important to pick the right type of clothing to get the most enjoyment out of your pup experience. While you can certainly go completely naked or wear the bare minimum with only a jock, some puppies like to complete their look with a full outfit. With the large diversity in fetish clothing options, it’s important to know what to look for when building your own fetish wardrobe. For more information about fetish clothing, check out my YouTube page at: youtube.com/whiteoutrubber
Most Recommended – Spandex / Zentai
Spandex truly is the best combination of strength and flexibility when it comes to fetish clothing for puppy play. It’s easy to put on, very cheap to purchase, and will hold up to all the rough play a puppy could ever want. Whenever I participate in a puppy event or gear up for private fun, 90% of the time I’ll choose spandex. This material is also the easiest to clean, with most suits being machine washable. That’s important since puppies tend to build up quite a bit of sweat during play. When the clothing does rip after countless play sessions, it is easy to repair with some basic sewing skills.
Spandex has several different designs to choose from. I personally am a fan of full coverage, so I chose full body suits. These full suits are very similar to skin tight rubber catsuits and are called “zentai suits”. I also frequently see puppies romping in wrestling singlets, which are also made from spandex. These allow for coverage of the body while keeping the arms and knees exposed. This is more of a personal preference. However, wrestling singlets are more forgiving to larger body types than a full coverage zentai.
Leather is another great material for puppy play! It’s easily the strongest material listed and will hold up for many years. However, keep in mind that many moshes have strict rules when it comes to metal accessories on gear. I have seen pups forced to take off their leather gear because it contained spikes or studs that could potentially harm another puppy. I rarely see puppies in full le
ather outfits during play. This is because it is possible to scuff and scratch, a risk most people wouldn’t want to take on a $500 pair of pants.
Most commonly seen are leather harness and collars, which leather is the most suited material for. I personally will combine a leather harness and a zentai and have achieved some great results with both style and functionality. Leather is also a fantastic choice for puppy accessories. I personally own a pair of leather fist mitts which have survived countless moshes! Leather puppy hoods have also been a popular choice for years and I know pups still using their original Mr. S hood after over a decade.
Neoprene is most commonly used for puppy hoods and accessories. Many manufacturers will also produce neoprene pants, shirts, and full body catsuits. While hoods and accessories are certainly fine for normal puppy use, I personally have seen horror stories from neoprene clothing used during puppy play. I recall seeing a pup at IML two years ago who had a pair of beautiful neoprene pants which were worn during the woof camp puppy mosh. After an hour of participating in the romp, the once pristine pants were absolutely destroyed with several cuts and small chunks of the neoprene foam falling off. Neoprene is very sensitive to cuts and scratches, especially if you are constantly on your knees. Even with knee pads, it is very easy to create perm
anent creases from regular puppy play.
That being said, there are still many options available where neoprene can be safely used in rougher situations. Instead of full pants and shirts, it is most recommended to purchase neoprene with exposed knees and elbows. These can be neoprene tank tops, shorts, or surf suits. This means the high stress areas will be avoided entirely when engaging in rough play.
Latex / Rubber
Latex and rubber clothing is very sensitive to tears and rips! While it’s perfectly fine if you’re simply posing for pictures. The risk of a blowout or rip is always possible when engaging in play. Rubber is best used for puppy accessories such as hoods and mitts. During the few times I have worn rubber for puppy fun, I was constantly taken out of the headspace to check and make sure nothing was ripping. At every major puppy mosh, I almost always find a latex pup scurrying away to get out of a ripped suit. If you do still wish to primarily be a latex pup make sure to invest in a thick rubber suit. Rubber thicknesses under .60mm should not be used and I have seen some puppies use .80mm suits for play.
In addition, knee pads are a must! Any high friction or high stress areas should be monitored regularly for pinhole tears which can rapidly develop into a massive blowout. These areas include the armpits, knees, and butt. Any areas around zippers should also be inspected regularly. When the rubber stretches, the zipper will remain rigid and cause increased stress around the glued areas. If any small rips are found, immediately stop wearing the gear and repair it before engaging in any further play.
This is turning into the worlds largest and most in depth research project about pup play, Last time we did this in 2017 we had over 1,700 respondents and by streamlining the process from then, we should have even more in 2019! There are many reasons we are conducting this large scale research project but here is a comprehensive list of what our objectives are:
- To help inspire future research in the academic community about the pup play community.
- To help inform workshop creators to help provide resources and topics that are the most helpful in the community.
- To create the first major comprehensive quantitative research series to be publicly viewable by the entire community.
- To see what topics are popular amongst the community to steer the direction of the pupplay.info resource and advice creation.
- To have quantitative facts to compare to 2017 results to begin seeing statistically significant trends in community to help community groups know what the greater picture looks like than what they only see in person.
We will be releasing the results as an academic paper and then later combined in with future articles and other projects planned. Raw data that could be traced back to an individual will not be released, and what will be released, will be designed so no specific individual can be traced.
We did this same system last time to great success, you can see the free eBook at this link
Privacy & Security
We will NOT be making the raw data publicly available, this is to ensure the privacy of participants and no data released will be capable of being traced back to specific individuals. We DO NOT collect usernames, email addresses or account information. Your privacy is our top priority, which is why every individual result will stay anonymous
We have upgraded not only the pupplay.info website but have also made sure the form system we use has SSL certification. This is a form of encryption that’s end-to-end in a nutshell, making sure no one is listening in or stealing information. To make sure that this encryption is used, make sure the urls begin with https:// if your browser is up to date, it will tell you if the page your looking at is secure by saying “secure” or showing a padlock icon depending on your OS.
Professional Data Miners have volunteered to help us sift through the data to give meaningful statistical results and will be under legally bound Non-Disclosure Agreements and will not be allowed to share information outside of the final published report that will be publicly available to all.
We did this same strategy last time in 2017 and was successful, we had no leaks in privacy and kept all our promises to the project, this is what were striving for again in 2019
Developed by the Community
If you have an idea or some feedback, don’t hesitate to ask us. If it is as unbiased as possible, there is a good chance it will go into the future parts editions. Many people in the community were involved in the second edition and helped make it more streamlined and easier to navigate.
Q: [Inset Question Here] is in the survey, but it isn’t as important as asking about [Inset Question Here].
A: If we put in every question we had, it would take a very long time to fill out. We made the 2017 survey 5 questionnaires and 124 questions; in 2019 its going to be only 1 questionnaire and 56 questions.
To keep these surveys at a reasonable size, we are have broken up major topics to be spread through future survey versions. The order of questions does NOT mean something in more important.
Question for Title Holders, past & current. What’s the best advice you have for someone who is considering running for a Title?Pup Aries
MR Says: I’m none just a #sashWife but be yourself and stay true to yourself.
ATP Says: Go into the experience looking to learn and grow. And while your doing it stay your self. Don’t change to try and fit a “look” you get further being true and honest.
BD Says: For who is CONSIDERING it? Well, the best thing someone did for me is repeatedly ask “With all that you’re doing already, what will having a title enable you to do that you can’t do now?” And be able to answer that in a way that feels authentic to you (and not just an excuse). If you don’t need the title, then don’t crowd the space. But if you actually CAN get something out of it, this exercise helps to keep expectations and goals a little more concrete and attainable. And the sash isn’t magic and it comes at a cost. It will NOT make you popular and liked, it won’t help your relationships, and no one ever turns a profit from it. Having a title is an opportunity and a catalyst. I’ve seen challenges crush some, and allow others to flourish, but I don’t think I’ve seen anyone who is fully the same after the experience as they were at the beginning of it. The best lesson one can learn from it is that you never needed the title to do anything…but sometimes you need the experience to really understand that.
EK Says: From the outside i would say “do your thang and ignore the haters. Lots of people have critiques and opinions.
GB Says: Have fun with the process. When you aren’t having fun take a break and come back later
TL Says: Don’t burn yourself out. You have a whole year to explore and do so much. Don’t feel you have to cram everything in right away. Will PM later with more insight. Enjoy the experience, make new relationships and connections, and be yourself. Never lose sight of that.
AQ Says: What message/platform are you trying to share with the masses? Also, as BD said “. . .what will having a title enable you to do that you can’t do now?” Regardless of whatever you decided have fun and enjoy yourself.
BAG Says: Remain humble throughout the process and have a fucking ball!!! You’re showing the judges and the audience who you are/how you embody the title you’re running for. My other big piece of advice is NEVER let anyone tell you, you can’t do it! Even yourself
RS Says: It’s a learning experience. It’s going to be a marathon. Have people to support you and push you through it. Play to your strengths. Be you 100%. Don’t give them what you think they want. At the end of the day you want to show the judges who you are. And have all the sex before and after the contest. Because during it, you may only have time to sleep and poop.
SS Says: Don’t, unless you’re really fucking clear on your perspective, your self-esteem, and your expectations.
ST Says: Have fun. BE YOURSELF!
IA Says: Really think about why you want it, can you handle everything that comes with it, and which title is actually appropriate for you.
TD Says: Have a good message you want to voice with the title you want to earn. Br yourself, listen and learn as you go. Be humble, have fun, shoe your personality and enjoy the experience
MP Says: Consider the time and money you will invest. Also, realize that it is a service position. A way to lead but also give back
KMO Says: Really really know that you want to. Everything else will fall into place.
DD Says: Titles do not fix you, they do not cover up the bad or make problems magically disappear. They amplify every thing that is already there the good and the bad. My lessons learned and advice to future title holders is to make sure all those things are known talked about and are in check or they will eat you alive.
MHJ Says: The best advice I could give is to run with your heart, your beliefs, and your
Steven Wolfvien Archer If it is in your heart go for it and going 100 % for it .
IM Says: Just give it your all and don’t allow doubt to enter your mind
TSJ Says: Make sure you have a support system to keep you motivated and sane for the title year. Line up your team to be a success. Ask for help and have a plan.
JD Says: Be yourself!
DRS Says: Be you, not what you think someone else wants from you. Do what you think is right. Be passionate. Most importantly, have fun!
JS Says: decide why you’re running and remind yourself of that every single day. Have fun. if it stops being fun, you’re doing it wrong. also, you can’t please everyone so don’t try….
DP Says: Relax, have fun , don’t stress just go with the flow an have lots of fun,
KS Says: Be true to yourself and have fun and don’t think about winning too hard it’s not the title that makes you it’s you that makes the title
XT Says: Have a platform or plan for the year, become part of your community and actually know it, and if you win, have fun and enjoy the adventure, it’s a great experience and you can help a lot of people if you make it about community and not yourself.
JVM Says: Know your limits. That it’s okay to put your work as a titleholder on the backburner while you maintain other priorities such as self care and your daily responsibilities like work or school. Also don’t let your title define you. Don’t lose yourself. Many titleholders fall victim to this. They let the pagentry and fame consume them and they lose focus on who they are and what they stand for. So remeber to stay present, grounded, and mindful of who you really are.
Let’s start a discussion. We have all run into these. What makes a toxic alpha/handler/dom? (This is personality not hiv) Do you think their is resolution to this problem or do you think it’s a walk away scenario. Please give your input. No one is wrong here.
Image may contain: 1 person, phone, close-up and indoor
PWF Says: Someone that refuses hard boundaries. Someone that wants to isolate you from friends and family.
SM Says: Someone who forces you to do something against the rules of the scene; does not ask for check ins during scenes; and doesn’t respect your wants or needs.
EH Says: For some they will never learn. Some were taught wrong and that’s when we step in to teach them corrective measures. And then some just don’t care. I think another way to help this is to teach other pups what to look out for and how to protect them
SD Says: Someone that is more concerned with their own needs than yours. Who tries to make you into something that you don’t want to be. A good Dom/Handler/Alpha’s responsibility is to guide a pup into becoming the person and pup they strive to be. It all comes down to one thing – respect. If you’re not getting that, then walk away.
BU Says: Somebody who cannot listen and adapt to their submissives needs. Someone who thinks that their way is always right, and that it’s the only way. Someone who constantly corrects submissives without good reason. Someone who doesn’t want to communicate
PH Says: Someone that is not willing to put the time and effort into getting to know each other. This goes for pups too. Rushing into a relationship just so you can say you have a pup, handler, Sir, boy, etc or a collar is just not worth it.
DB Says: I think a toxic alpha/handler is someone who “collects” pups and is unable to put in the time and effort to develop the relationship. It seems like they are doing it more for status than actually caring for our building the individual relationships.
MC Says: I would agree and add that, for me, that is a Back Away Slowly kind of situation.
Comment Below to share your opinions on this topic!
Most every state with a major lgbt, kink, or alt lifestyle community has a PAH. Everyone except for the state of virginia that all ends this year. Its official the launch of the SVA-PAH has happened.
We are very proud to announce that the state of virginia has joined the community of states with an organized PAH group. The SVA-PAH typically will be doing their events every 1st saturday if the month at MJs Tavern in norfolk virginia. We have already hosted 2 moshes and have our next one schedrule for feburary 1st call Puppy Love Night. We are excited to partner with already established local organizations to foster and create a safe play space for our pups and in doing so also create a stronger more united communy.
If youd like to keep up with the lastest that the SVA-PAH is doing i would recommend that for now you follow me Pup Ramsey on social media as i am the treasurer and advertising graphic designer. So i always post the lastest news on our events at least for now until we create a svapah facebook page.
I hope this post reaches you pups out there in the DMV area who thought you were alone and i hope to see you out at our next mosh!
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